Possible Connection Between Bees and Bee Stings Discovered

Researchers have announced a possible, maybe even probable, connection between the presence of bees and a condition known as a "bee sting". Symptoms of a bee sting are well known: swelling and pain are the most common. But, the cause of the condition has been heretofore unknown.

"This mystery has plagued physicians and scientists since the time of Hippocrates," explained Professor Richard Cornblick. "We could see people with this 'bee sting' affliction, and even found ways to treat it. But, determining the exact cause has been quite elusive."

Cornblick is vying for the Nobel Prize with his theory that 'bee stings' are actually caused by an insect known as a 'bee'. His current theory is his fourth on the subject. NBp has received permission to reproduce his conclusion here:

The bees collect pollen from flowers and then use a process called "thermopollenosis" to heat the pollen to a very high temperature. They do this to melt the pollen so that they can use it as a glue or something. Then, if they touch a person, that person will suffer the symptoms of a "bee sting" due to the superheated pollen. The symptoms, swelling and pain, are not unlike symptoms from a burn. I conclude that "bee stings" are in fact caused by "bees" due to the aforementioned process. QED.

Diagram from Cornblick's paper

Russian researchers have posed the theory that bees possess something called a "stinger" that pokes the unsuspecting person, injects them with a mild poison and then leaves the body of the bee. Other researchers have dismissed this theory as being a little farfetched and unpleasant.